notcool.

I realized today how incredibly selfish I am.

I didn't have a very good day, but I know it could have been worse. I fell into the trap of "please, pity me" and forgot to notice all of the good that did happen.
Work in general for me is tough, I am human and would rather hang out all day rather than work. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my job and what I do, however, I am easily discouraged because I can think of a million fun things I would rather do. To elaborate, some harsh words were said today and I was over it, I was mad and pouting; I wanted to give up. I chose to let satan put those words in my mind; that was his exact plan.
While I was fretting about my bad day, two of my friends were also having bad days, I got in an argument with my mom, and I didn't make any room for God in my angry heart.
I decided to pray before heading home from work, to calm me down a bit and when I did it hit me; I am SO selfish. I would rather talk about myself than listen. Rather do what I want than follow. There is absolutely nothing cool about that at all.
I am hurting for my friends right now and I feel horrible because they waited all day to talk to me about what is going on because of my bad day. A stupid bad day got in the way of listening to my dear friends hurts. A bad day got in the way of my momma and I's relationship. Reality check to Courtney, life isn't as bad as one day can make it seem.
Why are so many people scared of the dark? It is because of the things that happen in the dark. Why are we so afraid to get into low points in our lives? It is because satan can get ahold of our hearts and minds during those dark times.
Flashlight at night; God is our light.

God is in control, I gotta give myself to him, It is NOT about me anymore. Help me make it about YOU!