Sunday, October 24, 2010

Take a load off.

“Whenever you're in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.”

William James quotes

I was discussing relationships with a friend of mine; she's been divorced and now praying for a Godly man that loves her unconditionally. She will not settle and I admire that. We have talked a lot about communication, honesty, and "fighting" in a healthy way. Those are things that every relationship needs however, it seems like most "worldly" relationships miss the mark. Why is it that we settle for a love that has no Godly foundation or for a man/woman that does not give us the attention we need. My friend was in love but, that love was "taken" from her; our hearts are things that should be given. She realizes now (after years of marriage, three kids, separations and a divorce, along with other life lessons) that her heart deserves so much more than she has had and she will never let it be taken again.
Such a strong lesson for a young lady like myself.
[This is how I put relationships into an analogy for herself and mine:]
Put two rocks on each end of a scale, they are balanced and even-weighted. However, if you start to change the weight on one side and not the other, the scale will be off balanced and one side will be higher than the other letting it hold all of the weight. With our relationships, we want that scale to be balanced; when change comes, take a little weight off the other person. When a person becomes "higher" than the other and stays there, it is not healthy. God created us as equals giving us the ability to love one another so why would we ever make another one of his creations feel unlovable.
Love God. Love others. Love yourself.
Never settle.
Colossians 3:19

And you husbands must love your wives and never treat them harshly